BA’s Best Quiche Lorraine

Let me start by saying that it was smart for Bon Appétit to not put the total prep and bake times on this recipe. Honestly I’m not sure what they would’ve put, 17 hours? 1-2 holiday weekends? A fortnight? The amount of times the instructions say “let cool for 1 hour” is comical after a while. Do not, under any circumstances, try to make this quiche the same day you want to eat it.

Onto the ingredients… the recipe comments about the custard portions are hilariously accurate. It calls for 8 eggs and 3 1/2 cups of half-and-half to somehow fit in a 9 inch pie dish. I’m not sure what kind of drugs they were on when they did that math but I’ll take some. Luckily I listened to these irate bakers and halved those amounts which was perfect. I’m just sorry that the anonymous commenter on 12/06/17 who said “biggest waste of ingredients and time” was not also informed of this ahead of time.

After you’ve baked the final product for 1 hour, let it cool for 3 hours, tightly wrapped it up, put it in the fridge overnight and then reheated it for 20 minutes the next morning, you can finally enjoy your Easter! You will receive excellent feedback from members of your household while they devour this breakfast-filled pie. You will plead for everyone to slow down a bit and enjoy the meal. In the end, it will be gone so fast you’ll wonder where the last 17 hours of your life went. Did you even make the quiche? Was it all a dream?

Overall, it was truly delicious and hilariously difficult to make. Think of it as a personal journey that past BA readers once embarked on. You will ask yourself some tough questions. Did they really use a mesh-sieve to strain bacon grease? Did they spill the custard trying to get it into the oven? Did they have a quick cry around hour 9? You’ll never know but we’re all bonded for life now.

Happy Easter everybody and may the odds be ever in your favor.

Rating: 8/10

Dishes: Hire a dishwasher

Would make again: Maybe next Easter

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